Anywhere But Here
by Lara1221
Summary: James and Fred are stuck in the worst History of Magic class of the past century or so.


**Disclaimer: **Everything in this one shot belongs to JK Rowling. I'm not skilled enough to carve the pumpkin on the cover, either.

**Dedication: **To my amazing teachers that don't put me to sleep- thank you!

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Anywhere But Here

After glaring at Professor Binns for a solid fifteen minutes, as if the power of his gaze would make his professor explode, James Sirius Potter was positive that this was the worst class of History of Magic he had ever had the displeasure of experiencing. They had always been dreadful, horrid, boring...the list goes on. But there was something about today. He screamed into his scarf so it muffled the sound, and finally couldn't take it and slammed his Arithmancy textbook on the desk, his ink well shaking in the aftermath, trying to liven the place up, nothing happened. Professor Binns didn't even hear, he simply continued to drone on as if nothing had happened. James managed to wake his cousin up, though, and Fred elbowed him in the gut.

"Oi, what was that for? You git. I was having a very nice nap, thank you."

"Yeah, well, you know very well I can't sleep in class...tried and failed...and, you know," Fred raised an eyebrow, "she's watching," James muttered, not-so-subtly jerking his eyebrows in the direction of Adelaide, and Fred rolled his eyes.

"You _are_ aware that she despises you, right?"

"Impossible."

"Afraid it's not."

"Say it ain't so," James tweaked his voice a bit, laying a hand on his heart and feigning hurt.

Fred laughed out loud. Binns didn't even flinch, but a few of his classmates turned around to investigate the noise. Most of them chuckled, but Adelaide glared. She noticed Fred with stitches in his side, and she cracked a small smile, and James's heart fluttered.

He was _pathetic_. This isn't something that happens when you're 14! _Why me?_

_Damn grandfather, probably, _James thought_._

"I'd literally rather be dying then be right here, right now," James said.

"Yeah, but, like, in some awesome, badass way, right? Shooting through space, or something, traversing the galaxy. Muggles are insane."

"Hm...I think I prefer being hijacked by Vikings. Vikings are cool. I'll be a pirate, at first, and we could have a War, my boat versus theirs, and then I would be so awesome in my last fight they would let me hop over to their side."

..."Vikings in space?"

James facepalmed.

"What kind of blasted Halloween is this, anyway?" Fred suddenly interrupted the silence. "We should do something, Jamie."

James snapped his head. "_Don't_ call me that." Fred chuckled, before James let out a mischievous grin. "But what did you have in mind?"

"Follow my lead," his cousin replied with a smirk. Slowly, Fred raised his dark wand and pointed it at Binns, tapping it for a moment in midair, eyes glinting as he decided on a spell and muttered it under his breath. They were supposed to practice, after all.

James eyed Binns, and had to stick a fist in his mouth to keep from exploding when he determined Fred had cast a color change charm. Starting from the bottom, the this was turning an alarming shade of red, and he had no idea.

Giggles broke out throughout the classroom, and James racked his brain, trying to come up with something quite evil he could do to Binns on Halloween while the red slowly changed to orange, then to yellow, just to the middle of the ghost's robes.

A fantastic idea appeared in James's mind, noticing the jack-o-lantern sitting on the windowsill. "_Aguamenti_," he muttered, angling his wand so the stream of water flew straight up, casting _wingardium leviosa _to keep it suspended in the air, gently maneuvering it to the pumpkin while Fred looked on. The water formed a column and swiftly dropped into the pumpkin, dousing the light and staying inside the pumpkin, the holes stopped with a quick charm. He raised the pumpkin up across the room, jerking hid wand away the moment the pumpkin reached him. It fell straight through the ghost, water and pumpkin slapping at the sides of him.

And for once, Binns was _pissed_.

When the professor looked down and realized he was the color of the rainbow, and he was soaked through with water and pumpkin seeds, the ghost's face turned a violent dark shade, mixing with the purple.

"WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS?!"

The entire class erupted in laughter as the professor scanned the room, looking back and forth between students in outrage.

"So help me Merlin, Morgana, and Circe! If the student who is responsible doesn't come forward _right now- _essays every day for the next week!"

"It was Potter," the voice shocked him out of his daze, surprised there was a snitch in their midst.

On her part, Adelaide seemed apologetic, but looked at him seriously. "I don't fancy writing essays because you won't come clean, thank you," and it seemed as if the rest of the class agreed.

James stuck his tongue out at her, which she so eloquently returned.

One day, man. One day.

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**A/N: **that was super fun to right! we all have _that _teacher, and these weasleys are just awesome :D Also, in my HC, James falls for a girl who doesnt like him very much the very first day as his grandfather did before him. I haven't characterized her much yet, but if you want to learn about her, wait around for my next gen one-shots. Or check out 19 years! please let me know if you liked it, and concrit would be appreciated! Written for:

**Hogwarts School Comp: History Of Magic: **write about a history of magic class (prompts: ink, space, galaxy, shooting, viking, war, hop); **Charms: **write a story using three or more charms (prompts: pumpkin, tap, practice, pirate, scarf)  
**Weasleys, Weasleys, and more weasleys! challenge**: write about platonic family relationships in the Weasley family  
**Disney Plotline Comp: Minuteman:** write about a character doing something they know is wrong  
**Off the Block Comp: Easy Butterfly:** write about a next gen kid  
**Star Challenge: Adara**: write about weasleys  
**Chp. 2 Title Acrostics Comp: A: **object-arithmancy textbook  
**Hogwarts Winter Games Challenge: Alpine Skiing Super-G: **takes place at Hogwarts  
**Occasions Challenge: **Halloween  
**Fanfiction Terms comp: canon: **something goes according to plan

Hope you enjoyed! Also, I'm taking a poll about author's notes, so if you could check that out, that would be great :)

Lara,


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